How do you respond to people who say hurtful things to you?

How to respond to rude comments
  1. Pause to regroup. When someone says something hurtful, consider taking several seconds — or longer — to breathe, feel your feelings, and consider your response. ...
  2. Detach. ...
  3. Advocate for yourself. ...
  4. State your boundary. ...
  5. Don't waste your breath. ...
  6. Leverage nonverbal cues. ...
  7. Flip the script.


How do you politely respond to a rude person?

3 ways to respond to rude behavior
  1. Try kindness. You can't prevent other people's bad behavior, but you can control your reactions. ...
  2. Remember, it's not about you. A difficult person's behavior is precisely that: their behavior. ...
  3. Show empathy. Try to imagine things from the rude person's point of view.


How do you respond when someone says mean things?

If someone says something offensive, simply respond by not saying anything for a few seconds and then walk away. This may help the person get the hint. Consult the person offended. If an offensive comment is not about you personally, you may want to consult with the person potentially offended before stepping in.


Why do people make hurtful comments?

Often well-meaning people say hurtful things because they're at a loss for words. Not knowing the right thing to say, they may turn to canned statements, like “don't worry about it” or “you'll be fine”—the kinds of statements that tend to be least helpful in difficult times.

How do I ignore hurtful comments?

When someone says words or opinions that are hurtful in nature, here is how I am learning to approach it:
  1. It usually isn't about you. ...
  2. Words mean different things to each of us. ...
  3. Words can't hurt you without your permission. ...
  4. Allow yourself to feel your reaction. ...
  5. Notice the wound inside. ...
  6. Speak your truth.


setting boundaries when people say hurtful things



How do you deal with hurtful words?

Here are some quick tips to try the next time you are hurt by someone's words or actions:
  1. Don't take it personally. Hurt feelings are a part of life. ...
  2. Express your hurt feelings. Keeping your feelings bottled up is not the correct way to deal with them. ...
  3. Let it go! Other people's opinions do not define us. ...
  4. End it.


How do you take back hurtful words?

Instead, you just need to kick off your retraction with something like, “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that,” or “I'm sorry, that came out wrong.” Statements like that take ownership of your mistake right out of the way. And, remember to take note of those two key words: I'm sorry.

How do I move on from a hurtful comment?

Acknowledge your anger and hurt together.

To cope in a healthy way, acknowledge both these emotions together. Literally say to yourself, "I feel hurt and angry...." Acknowledging your specific, precise emotions is the first step of self-compassion. Acknowledging your anger can help you not personalize the comment.


What causes a person to be mean?

What causes anger issues? Many things can trigger anger, including stress, family problems, and financial issues. For some people, anger is caused by an underlying disorder, such as alcoholism or depression. Anger itself isn't considered a disorder, but anger is a known symptom of several mental health conditions.

What do you say when someone mistreats you?

If you're hoping to salvage the relationship with the person who has hurt you, then here are some great conversation points to add in:
  1. “I care about you.”
  2. “I respect you.”
  3. “I want to fix our relationship.”
  4. “I want to move past this.”
  5. “I want to understand each other better.”
  6. “I want to be open with you.”


How do you respond when someone insults you back?

Here are five helpful ways to respond to backhanded compliments:
  1. Ignore it. Staying silent doesn't mean you're letting yourself get pushed around. ...
  2. Say, "Thank you." ...
  3. Acknowledge the positive portion. ...
  4. Address the insult head-on. ...
  5. Keep your sense of humor.


How do you tell someone you feel disrespected?

5 Steps for Telling Someone They Hurt or Disrespected You
  1. Start with why what you want to say is important. ...
  2. Briefly describe what happened that felt hurtful or disrespectful. ...
  3. Say how their behavior made you feel—the impact. ...
  4. Ask for what you need going forward. ...
  5. End by reinforcing why you are making this request.


How do you deal with a mean person to you?

How to Deal With Mean People
  1. Take a deep breath: ...
  2. Don't internalize: ...
  3. Understand you have a choice: ...
  4. Don't take on their meanness as your own: ...
  5. Be assertive: ...
  6. Don't let them upset you anymore: ...
  7. Recognize that you can't make them change:


How do you outsmart a rude person?

10 Smart Ways to Deal with Rude People
  1. Remember, sometimes the rude person is you. ...
  2. Don't take it personally (even if it's personal). ...
  3. Find out why. ...
  4. Be objective and analyze the rudeness. ...
  5. Don't join the drama club. ...
  6. Let it drop and walk away. ...
  7. Consider offering help. ...
  8. Understand rudeness as a habit.


How do you respond to a hurtful message?

11 Ways to Respond to a Mean or Toxic Text Message
  1. 1 “I'm not going to respond to this right now.”
  2. 2 “Are you trying to be mean?”
  3. 3 “Did I say or do something wrong?”
  4. 4 “Is this really about something else?”
  5. 5 “I'm really sorry you're hurting.”
  6. 6 “Why would you say that?”
  7. 7 “That's not cool.”


What mental illness causes meanness?

According to Florida State University's Allison Daurio and Jeanette Taylor (2021), the quality of meanness is one of 3 defining features of psychopathy, the personality trait characterized by lack of remorse, inability to feel empathy, and a certain amount of ruthlessness.

Is meanness a mental illness?

Meanness is not a clinical term or a personality disorder in the DSM-5. However, people with certain personality disorders have the tendency to be mean.


What mental illness causes people to be mean?

Overview. Intermittent explosive disorder involves repeated, sudden episodes of impulsive, aggressive, violent behavior or angry verbal outbursts in which you react grossly out of proportion to the situation.

How do you accept hurtful things?

Tips for letting go
  1. Create a positive mantra to counter the painful thoughts. ...
  2. Create physical distance. ...
  3. Do your own work. ...
  4. Practice mindfulness. ...
  5. Be gentle with yourself. ...
  6. Allow the negative emotions to flow. ...
  7. Accept that the other person may not apologize. ...
  8. Engage in self-care.


Why do some people say mean things?

Anger is usually the reason why people say hurtful things. Before you dissect those verbal attacks, or analyze the 'whys' and 'wherefores' of the negative behavior, it is best to understand where those words are coming from. Ninety-nine percent of the time, they are the manifestations of an intense emotion – anger.


How do you not let what people say about you bother you?

Here are 15 sure-fire ways to eliminate the worry and free yourself to be yourself.
  1. Focus on what matters. ...
  2. Keep perspective. ...
  3. You know best. ...
  4. Mind your own business. ...
  5. Desensitize your triggers. ...
  6. Stop overthinking. ...
  7. Seek constructive feedback. ...
  8. Don't try to please everyone.


Why do people lash out and say hurtful things?

Self-protection

Sometimes people lash out so that they can reject before they get rejected. This is a way for the person lashing out to feel safe in vulnerable situations where they feel that they might be rejected or abandoned. It is a way for the person to feel more in control, which makes them feel safer.

What do you do when someone hurts you and doesn't care?

If the person knows we are being hurt and doesn't care, the best is to forgive (to not feel pressured or guilty if we do care about this person), but also to keep distance in order to avoid future problems. Also, we must make sure we are communicating our concern in a clear and honest way.


How do you forgive someone who said something hurtful?

Here are eight ways to work on that.
  1. Get mad, feel hurt and grieve. ...
  2. Ask yourself whether your anger is constructive or destructive. ...
  3. Don't worry—you aren't saying the offense was OK. ...
  4. Practice stress-reduction techniques. ...
  5. Remind yourself why you want this person in your life. ...
  6. Set boundaries.


What is the meanest thing to say to someone?

Words are powerful weapons and can do a lot of damage. “ You're *#@! % stupid. ” “ I wish you were never born. ” “ No one is ever going to love you, you're so *#@! % fat and ugly. ” “ You never get anything right. ” “ You're worthless. ” These are mean and degrading things to say to someone.